I talked about being a perfectionist, and how it’s been undermining my life, especially when I let it control my state of mind and my emotions.
Just to be clear, being a perfectionist does NOT mean that what I do ends up being perfect. It means I want the things I do to be perfect because I’m afraid of what will happen if it’s not perfect. So what I end up doing is… nothing.
And it sucks.
For a long time, I wasn’t aware of my perfectionism tendency. In my mind, I was making plans to make things happen, doing my best (still in my mind) to do it, but there was always something, external or internal, that prevented me from completing it.
Since then, I’ve become aware of some of my flaws, and I’m willing to work on them so that they’re not ruling my life. I would say that both processes are hard because no one really likes to realize that they’re flawed, and changing is a hell of a challenge. But this is where acceptance gets really helpful.
Acceptance does NOT mean I realize my flaws and just live with them. To me, it’s the second step -the first step is awareness- to be able to make a change, and to help me take action to create the life that I want. When I accept that I’ve used perfectionism as an excuse not to complete a project, I’m able to disconnect from the perfectionism and all the emotions that it creates. I become free to take action.
I want meaning in my life, and do things that matter to me. Using my default-self as a template would not let me live the life that I want. That’s why I’m always talking about changing, and how I try things to be able to make the changes that I seek.
Here’s how I’m training to be imperfect:
- I try not to take my thoughts seriously
- I take action
Simple, but not easy, especially when you have perfectionism tendencies.
Do you have a flaw that prevents you from living the life you want? How do you try to change it?
Happy Halloween!!! 🎃